5 things to do on twitter when you’re bored!

1. Tell your ‘followers’ when they are boring you. They need to know just how lazy they are! Whey aren’t they being entertaining today?! It’s unthinkable.

2. Sign up your band and follow everyone you’re following and all their followers too! It’s a totally great way to build followers instantly! No one will mind if they don’t like your style of music, because they will want to seem hip too, and they’ll follow you! Your record deal is right around the corner, don’t miss out!

3. Tell everyone about your sex life! Apart from gaining loads of new followers, people will try and help you overcome your relationship’s erectile dysfunction!  Because twitter is a global phenomena, you’ll get some really diverse and holistic advice! Priceless! (If you’re adolescent, just lie! It’s easy!!)

4. Set up an Auto-DM! People are already taking advantage of this kind of service, if you don’t reciprocate, how are you going to ‘connect’? Try some wording, but be sure to tell people how much you’re going to enjoy their tweets!

5. Re-tweet random stuff. Everyone does this and you can see how popular they are! You have to re-tweet to be anything on twitter, as musings about your cat are great, but re-tweeting will give you that edge you’ve been needing! That’s it. I hope you were inspired by my amazingly cool list. Please RT!